At a recent get-together, a friend of mine shared that she was worried about getting into the “dating world” so much later than some of her friends since she hasn’t been in a romantic relationship yet. She isn’t the first person I’ve heard voice these concerns. The pressure to start dating young is so high that it’s internalized, especially by single women of all ages. As someone who did start dating young and is currently in a relationship, I wanted to share some benefits of dating late and just being single that I missed out on by jumping into a relationship at age 14.

As far as relationships go, the one you have with yourself is the most important by far.

Emily Brewer

As far as relationships go, the one you have with yourself is the most important by far. The only thing we are guaranteed to have throughout our whole lives is ourselves, and that doesn’t have to be a sad thing. Instead, we can take the time to develop that relationship and celebrate it just as we would want to do with any other relationship. Waiting to enter romantic relationships with others can give you the time and space to really focus on your relationship with yourself until you find the right time and person to share yourself with.

While it is possible to have both a healthy relationship with yourself and with a romantic partner, it’s also easy to neglect your personal relationship in favor of the other, causing you to lose touch with yourself. Although we don’t need to know exactly who we are at all times, your personal relationship is always developing, and it’s easy for those close to you to change the direction of that development, for better or for worse.

In my experience, my early relationship negatively impacted my personal relationship because I was trying to make the relationship seem right for me when it just wasn’t. It takes a strong person to choose what’s right for them when it goes against the perceived norm, and that strength and individuality is so much more valuable in the long run than almost any romantic relationship.

Everyone is different, and our timelines reflect that. A romantic relationship may be right for someone else at a certain time, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. Whether we are single or in a relationship, our personal relationships deserve our time and effort. I believe that things will happen when they are meant to, and in the meantime, we deserve to focus on ourselves.

Comments

comments